Almost time...
12 Jun 2005 11:00 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jennickelsWell, it is almost time, time for me to give up this journal. I'm sad. I really enjoy writing in this every night. I was telling Kelly about it tonight. She got a regular book journal for graduation and dosen't know if she will ever use it. I never could keep a journal when I was younger. I was always afraid someone would read it, like Ryan, but now...
I think the key is writing it as if you were writing to a good friend, just like if you were talking to them. I'm going to have to go get a book to write in. Or I guess I can just write it on the computer and hope Patrick doesn't try to read it. I don't care if complete strangers read this but I don't think I could handle it if he saw it. He would take everything personally. I guess I would, too, if I saw people writing about me. I haven't said anything bad, yet. :)
So, Patrick got home around 8am this morning. I was waiting for him. I slept nude last night. Just for him. I hate being without my clothes but I was so tired after my shower that I just snuggled into my quilt without getting dressed. By the time he came in I was in my undies and a t-shirt (I had to get up and use the bathroom).
I heard Owen yell "DADDY" and knew he was home. I couldn't help but smile. I was so, what's the word I'm looking...horny. I never thought I would say that. It's been a long time since I felt like that. So Patrick convinced the kids to go watch TV and we had a little adult time. It was nice. Then we went to breakfast. It's really hard to stay in the mood when the kids bang on the door every ten minutes.
I spent a couple hours talking to Kelly when Meagan went to play with Hailey. I didn't think it was going to be so hard to leave. I hate this city so much--the traffic and noise and crime (not that where we are moving to is any different) but talking to Kelly for maybe the last time was killing me. She is like my little sister and I won't see her anymore. I want to cry thinking about it. Sixteen years of friendship...I can't believe it has been that long. I'll never have another friend like her.
I think tomorrow, sometime, when I have time I'll write her a little letter to let her know how much she means to me. I'm going to miss her more then anything, ever. I hope we can somehow stay friends but... I don't know. She is always so busy with her life. :(
Anyway, we go to pick up the u-haul tomorrow and we'll start packing. The computer will be one of the last things to pack up so, I'll try to get one last entry in.
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I have moved so many times in my life, you would think I was used to it by now. I remember moving to this house when I was 12. I was so excited and so scared at the same time. I remember moving off to college and leaving Chicago behind, then moving out of the dorms and into my first apartmen. Then there was leaving that little place and moving into Patrick's parents' house. That was hard too because I didn't want to leave the apartment and my freedom. But things change. Kids will do that to you.
OK, I'm starting to get sad again. I better get this done. It's 11 already and I've been so tired today. I missed the whole race because I couldn't concentrate so I got on the computer (then I went to Kelly's). Carl Edwards won--YIPEE! That's two for the rookie (well almost rookie, I guess).
I think the key is writing it as if you were writing to a good friend, just like if you were talking to them. I'm going to have to go get a book to write in. Or I guess I can just write it on the computer and hope Patrick doesn't try to read it. I don't care if complete strangers read this but I don't think I could handle it if he saw it. He would take everything personally. I guess I would, too, if I saw people writing about me. I haven't said anything bad, yet. :)
So, Patrick got home around 8am this morning. I was waiting for him. I slept nude last night. Just for him. I hate being without my clothes but I was so tired after my shower that I just snuggled into my quilt without getting dressed. By the time he came in I was in my undies and a t-shirt (I had to get up and use the bathroom).
I heard Owen yell "DADDY" and knew he was home. I couldn't help but smile. I was so, what's the word I'm looking...horny. I never thought I would say that. It's been a long time since I felt like that. So Patrick convinced the kids to go watch TV and we had a little adult time. It was nice. Then we went to breakfast. It's really hard to stay in the mood when the kids bang on the door every ten minutes.
I spent a couple hours talking to Kelly when Meagan went to play with Hailey. I didn't think it was going to be so hard to leave. I hate this city so much--the traffic and noise and crime (not that where we are moving to is any different) but talking to Kelly for maybe the last time was killing me. She is like my little sister and I won't see her anymore. I want to cry thinking about it. Sixteen years of friendship...I can't believe it has been that long. I'll never have another friend like her.
I think tomorrow, sometime, when I have time I'll write her a little letter to let her know how much she means to me. I'm going to miss her more then anything, ever. I hope we can somehow stay friends but... I don't know. She is always so busy with her life. :(
Anyway, we go to pick up the u-haul tomorrow and we'll start packing. The computer will be one of the last things to pack up so, I'll try to get one last entry in.
-----------------------------
I have moved so many times in my life, you would think I was used to it by now. I remember moving to this house when I was 12. I was so excited and so scared at the same time. I remember moving off to college and leaving Chicago behind, then moving out of the dorms and into my first apartmen. Then there was leaving that little place and moving into Patrick's parents' house. That was hard too because I didn't want to leave the apartment and my freedom. But things change. Kids will do that to you.
OK, I'm starting to get sad again. I better get this done. It's 11 already and I've been so tired today. I missed the whole race because I couldn't concentrate so I got on the computer (then I went to Kelly's). Carl Edwards won--YIPEE! That's two for the rookie (well almost rookie, I guess).
